Does anyone really care about Week 17 picks? If so I'll make them in the post.
I like the smell of weld.
My New Years resolution is to eat more pierogies and cum inside vagina.
Did I rail on New Years Resoltuions on here or the ol el Pad blog?
Cliff Notes version: I hate people who make NY resolutions, it's complete shit.
Only thing that changes at midnight is the year. Your still an asshole, your still fat and you still make poor decisions. Eat a dick new year resolution bitches.
Remember that conversation we had a few times where I was amazed at things like, I wonder who the first guy to pull a lobster out of the ocean and eat it. Food makes so much sense to me I have already decided that if shit continues downhill in this industry that I will go to Culinary School and become a chef. NS.
Did I ever tell you the story that I almost enlisted in the Marine corp?
I said to my family the other day, after the huge xmas eve feast, why don't we eat more of this shit throughout the year and my uncle said because then today wouldn't be so special.
That guy drops gems for days. What a dude. Closest thing to a father figure in my life.
Crazy too you think, shit I'm 32, soon to be 33 and the need for a dad in your life is stronger than ever. you'd think as you got older it fade away. It doesn't.
Man I am real talkative this morning.
I was readint a thesis on the subprime mortgage crash and how it correlates to the Fiscal Cliff -it's by a charting expert - normally I hate charts because they are tunnel vision but this was pretty good.
No clue why I just mentioned that.
I'm 88% sure I will be at Super Bowl 2014.
I tried to count how many beers I drank this year, like approx. Gave up. What a dumb idea.
Jessica Rabbit, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty. Fuck Marry Kill.
GO!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
303 comments:
1 – 200 of 303 Newer› Newest»for the record
I'd fuck the living shit out of Jessica Rabbit.
Kill Sleeping Beauty, lazy bitch.
And Marry Snow White.
"Wal-Mart (WMT) tested same-day delivery service this holiday season in 5 markets as Amazon (AMZN) hinted at expanding its same-day shipping service. eBay's (EBAY) Now iPhone app - available in NYC and San Francisco - allows customers to choose items from physical stores and have them dropped off same-day at an apartment, office, coffee shop, or bar (no health club?) for a $5 fee. "People want it now, they want it fast," says eBay spokeswoman Lina Shustarovich. One issue: Profitability. Does anybody remember Kozmo.com and Webvan?"
e-commerce suiteness
order it, drop it off
sounds so simple
how the fuck does a 2-14 team have 5 probowl players?
that's a good indication that the coach is a baffoon for one
The air around a lightning strike is five times hotter than the sun.
pro bowl sucks
The lady cop that got kilt this week was killed by her husband. What a doooosh.
They should just make the Pro Bowl an award to give out. All-NFC, All-AFC, and All-Pro.
heard that before
was so pissed off at work last night. my boss is some young chick who has no idea about time management and she never gets out of there on time, and a lot of times we get stuck there late too because she's a moron. Last night, she's asking us to do shit when we're supposed to be leaving. We finally get out of there at 12:30. I live < a mile from work. So I pull out into the road and get stopped at the red light. Light turns green and I make a left. I am pissed off so I gun it. I don't squeal my tires but I take off quickly. I get up to between 50-55 mph, limit is 45. I go about 1/4 and turn into my neighborhood. As I'm making my turn, I see headlights behind me coming up pretty quickly, and then the blue/red lights come on. I'm like fuck. I pull over and dude comes up and says can you guess why I pulled you over. I said yeah I took off from that light quickly. He said yeah there are like 3 or 4 things you did. You made a wide turn because you didn't turn into the first lane. You were speeding. And you turned pretty fast into this neighborhood. Why did you do all that? I said "work let me out late and I have to work in a few hours and I'm pissed. Bad excuse, I know." He takes license, insurance, registration, goes back to his car. Comes back 2 minutes later and says I'm gonna do you a yahuge favor and let you go. But slow down.
are the Clippers serious
"Comes back 2 minutes later and says I'm gonna do you a yahuge favor and let you go."
fucking suite
he must of* heard about my cop interview
you sucked his dick didn't you
And cmk is preggers. Tensions are high in the as.hold.
OH. Did I tell yous what one of the local police departments does to tavern-goers?
The Port Washington police mark cars' tail lights that are parked around the bars with a white marker so they can identify who to pull over for DUI/OWI. Fucking bullshit and illegal as fuck.
steal a cab
done and done
And cmk is preggers. Tensions are high in the as.hold.
That's about the least stressful thing
Keith's a seasoned vet with this pregnancy stuff now. Out here letting his head get even bigger.
I made a joke to cmk on xmas that this one doesn't seem any different than the first one. They've both been pretty easy.
and she punched you in the face?
2nd pregnancy seemed way less stressful
already knew what to expect, a lot of familiarity
weren't runnign to the doctor every 3 days thinking that something was wrong
yeah, also the baby itself
you freak out ALOT LESS with #2
almost to the point of neglect
the first one you listened to their breath at night to make sure they are alive
Police searched for a woman who killed a man by pushing him in front of a subway train and released surveillance video Friday of her running away from the station.
hayzoos
and she punched you in the face?
She knew I was joking
chicken nugget FATHER
that article is pretty damned good
Nick Stahl, who played Yellow Bastard in Sin City, and John Connor in the Terminator movie they shouldn't have made, was arrested in Los Angeles for jerking it in a Hollywood adult store last night.
"Comes back 2 minutes later and says I'm gonna do you a yahuge favor and let you go. But slow down."
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
cool cop, I like to see honesty rewarded
oops, ^^^^^^^^^ was meant for EPs "fucking suite" comment
off ze grid
hurry back
did i tell everyone my story about getting pulled over in Idaho whilst at my Grandpa's 90th birthday?
Did I tell you guys about my niece pulling over a cop?
/jug
if I did, you can skip this comment
Was driving from the airport to my grandpa's house, had my sister in the rental car. I was in the left lane just driving along talking. Came up on a cop and slowed down to the speed limit. ended up passing the cop because he was going below the limit. He pulls me over. Asks me how fast I was going. Gave him the standard, between 65 and 70. He gives me some grief saying i kept speeding up and slowing down, was as high as 75...etc. Notices i'm from Colorado, asks why i'm in town. Did I just leave the airport...etc. Is this a rental car. Then asks for my rental agreement, which is in the trunk. He follows me back to the trunk with his hand on his gun. I give him the rental agreement and he tells me to set the car on cruise control at 65, and I won't have any problems, lets me go.
My niece got sent to the bing for pushing yay for the last 5 years.
/jug
s driving from the airport to my grandpa's house, had my sister in the rental car. I was in the left lane just driving along talking. Came up on a cop and slowed down to the speed limit. ended up passing the cop because he was going below the limit. He pulls me over. Asks me how fast I was going. Gave him the standard, between 65 and 70. He gives me some grief saying i kept speeding up and slowing down, was as high as 75...etc. Notices i'm from Colorado, asks why i'm in town. Did I just leave the airport...etc. Is this a rental car. Then asks for my rental agreement, which is in the trunk. He follows me back to the trunk with his hand on his gun. I give him the rental agreement and he tells me to set the car on cruise control at 65, and I won't have any problems, lets me go.
Similar thing happened to my niece. But she was going 76.
/jug
I told my sister that I didn't know it was illegal to speed up and slow down on the freeway
I told my sister that I didn't know it was illegal to speed up and slow down on the freeway
Maybe more suspicious than illegal
Did you make sure that cop was fired?
"I will go to Culinary School and become a chef. NS."
be careful (ns); those are the worse schools as far as tuition, job openings after graduation, and starting positions/salaries go IMO
-from what I hear, most graduate with six figure debt working as line cooks at around $10/hr
most graduate with six figure debt
Who cares? Just don't pay it.
/hsilob
"from what I hear, most graduate with six figure debt working as line cooks at around $10/hr"
then they really need that 2% holiday
my favorite cops were the Sconnie cops at Rockfest
I drank completely shamelessly in front of the police officers, walking around swigging from my bottle of JD while looking about 12 years old.
No officer ever approached me *unless* I was wearing my Chris Carter jersey. The 3 times I wore it over the years, pretty much the exact same scenario went down
1) cop: you don't look 21, do you have identification
2) drunk kod: back at the tent...you know, fuck Chris Carter (taking off jersey) Packers are going to stomp us again
3) cop: you seem old enough, careful wearing that jersey around here*
*that was good advice on the whole; I got accosted by a Packer fan in his 30s missing half his teeth, I'm pretty certain we were about to fight when I refused to take off the jersey, until a much larger and older guy wearing a Vikings hat came and intervened...I guess that Pack fan only wanted to pick a fight with a 115 lb 16 y/o
I would have absolutely whooped his ass for the record though (ns)
watched 21 jump street last night
it was funny enuff
"I got accosted by a Packer fan in his 30s missing half his teeth, I'm pretty certain we were about to fight when I refused to take off the jersey, until a much larger and older guy wearing a Vikings hat came and intervened"
People used to always fuck with me in the Moss jersey. I was a YA-HUUGE asshole though. It was hilarious. To this day, I still love fucking with Packers fans. I get a monster kick out of making their dumbasses blood boil over stupid football.
Traveling back today. Hope it is smooth.
I was a YA-HUUGE asshole though.
was?
"was?"
kettle
"Traveling back today. Hope it is smooth."
hope you have time to beat Utah so we can get this train a movin
Fuck JR. Kill Sw. Marry SB
Wife would sleep almost as Much as me.
Utah will win.
hope you have time to beat Utah so we can get this train a movin
twhnbs
I should be able to play tonight
if you're not sleeping
True
"My New Years resolution is to eat more pierogies and cum inside vagina."
sas Keith didn't comment about ep eating cum
I just figured it meant LP wanted another kid
Cmlp will let him put a pierogi in her vagina?
like most New years resolutions, that one won't last a week
My niece always follows through with her New Years resolutions
/jug
so, what's pissing me off today you wonder?
oh, you weren't. Oh well, this
"President Vladimir Putin on Friday signed a law banning Americans from adopting Russian children"
making a political point by directly harming tens of thousands of your own country's children, fuck you Putin
"Girl dies in Meeker County sledding accident
The girl had been sledding down a hill with other children in the backyard when her sled hit a raised stump and she was ejected from the sled, according to Meeker County Sheriff Jeff Norlin."
fuck man; I don't know if I could ever sleep if I was a parent
I would have absolutely whooped his ass for the record though (ns)
lol
i would trade Zack Wheeler in a god damn second for Justin Upton
"lol"
yeah, I'm still more than a little disappointed about that intervention. Crowd of pack fans was cheering him on, I was taunting the crowd that a little drunk kid could beat up your average Pack fan, and I was about to demonstrate that for the group
do you know karate?
hakido?
he's pretty good with a bow staff
i believe he can kick ass but there has to be a reason, he has to have a skill set he relies on
"was?"
Am
"i believe he can kick ass but there has to be a reason, he has to have a skill set he relies on"
Angry orangutang
Franziska Hansen is a German woman with large breasts. Like, 38DD large. Tim Schmidt is a German lawyer Franziska dated. He is also a man obviously not capable of handling a woman of ample proportions, as he had her charged recently with “attempted murder with a weapon” — the in question weapon being her mountainous mams. Yes, Schmidt claims Hansen tried to smother him to death with her prodigious palookas.
“The incident happened in May – we were having sex…She was sitting on me naked and I was kissing her breasts. Suddenly she grabbed my head and pushed between her breasts with all of her force…I couldn’t breathe any more, I must have turned blue. I couldn’t tear myself free and I thought I was going to die.”
orangutan
"do you know karate?
hakido?"
-nah, it was from tennis actually (ns); back in those days, I went to the gym 7 days a week (4 to lift weights, 3 to work on cardio) and played about 3 hours of tennis every day on top of that. Did that consistently from 9th-12th grade.
-so while I had no fighting training, by around 1996 I was freakishly strong (set 3 HS records in the weight-room in 97...at a large public city school no less), quicker than anybody I'd ever met, and in top shape cardio-wise. As you guys probably have learnt by now, I got a lot of fight (and some crazy) in me as well
-of course that was circa 94-97, between smoking, car accident and RA, 99% of the populace could completely kick my ass these days
Was that comment from kod or LP?
there are some similarities
ha
funny, i was a freak in high school too
"there are some similarities
ha"
aitch, for sure
My niece is faster & stronger than all of you
/jug
love this jug niece era
"funny, i was a freak in high school too"
Let me tell you about this basketballer I used to know
/Meiz
ha
"funny, i was a freak in high school too"
"Let me tell you about this basketballer I used to know"
in the wink of a young girls eye......
Bruce is awful
/tp
i was thinking when readin all this tebow crap
how often do you think Elway sits back in his office chair and belly laugh when he thinks of the trade he made with the Jets
2-3 times a day no?
Albert's always sincere, he's the sensitive type; his intentions are clear, he wants to be well-liked
going through some old CC gems here this afternoon, lots of good stuff
Leg 1 done. Leg 2 delayed.
I'm gonna jam some Muse and probably Good Kid M.A.D.D. City on the way up to the cabin.
you people and the layovers
Waitress at itasca in airport says sprite has caffeine but iced tea doesn't. MN is odd.
If I could fly direct I would but Bismarck doesn't fly direct to many places. Minneapolis Denver and Vegas. Maybe phoenix. And I think Jamestown or devils lake.
Layover was going to be 1 hrs. Now it's 2.
Leg 1 done. Leg 2 delayed.
Whatta gotta UFC picks
Dos Santos cruises
Suite. I bet NY Guy that Cain will win
"Waitress at itasca in airport says sprite has caffeine but iced tea doesn't. MN is odd."
Maybe that why she's waitressing in an airport.
"Layover was going to be 1 hrs. Now it's 2."
less NCAA time
*Cue some smart-mouth reply stating how airport waitresses make a killing.
::looks at Keith::
If tem doesn't play NCAA tonight, I'm gonna auto advance
(S)
::looks at Keith::
Why would I say anything like that?
ns
Joe Lauzon vs Jim Miller
Miller
Tim Boetsch vs Constantinos
Tim
Alan Belcher vs Yushin
Yushin
Chris Leben vs Derek Brunson
Chris
Brad Pickett vs Eddie
Eddie
Byron Bloodworth vs Erik
Bloodworth
Michael Johnson vs Myles
Myles...eteo
Todd Duffee vs Phil de
Todd
Chris Cariaso vs John Moraga
Chris
Suite. I bet NY Guy that Cain will win
You're welcome
Ncaa time should be the same. Ill leave the airport after rush hour so I'll get home earlier.
Ill leave the airport after rush hour so I'll get home earlier.
Smat
"Waitress at itasca in airport says sprite has caffeine but iced tea doesn't. MN is odd."
sounds like she's from Wisconsin
s
"itasca in airport"
cool, I work in Itasca
Is it an Italian grille?
yes, Italian grill/county
also home to the other, less famous, Grand Rapids
(like Bloomington, or Detroit, or Rochester, Minnesota)
Quarterback Terrelle Pryor will make his first NFL start Sunday in the place of injured Carson Palmer, Oakland Raiders coach Dennis Allen said Friday, according to the team's Twitter page.
walll
Still delayed. Fucking plane
more ufc picks meow
addict
"Still delayed. Fucking plane"
I don't like the Mpls airport much, flights always seems to be delayed, and IMO, it's gotten much worse since Delta took over Northwest
plus, no creative smoking options, like Denver or Tampa....killer
I did all or Damn near all. Who did I miss?
Plane was way late is getting here. They should have extra planes.
I did all or Damn near all. Who did I miss?
My reader missed that comment
Hellion kid 4 rows in front of me. SAS he is not next to me.
He already threw a tantrum when a lady tried to move him out of her seat. Apparently he gets the window regardless of what his ticket says.
His mom or whatever keeps saying they will throw him off the plane. He does not care.
My niece gets the window whenever she flies because she has her own plane
/jug
This kid just takes what he wants. He is living the dream.
Now he was tricked into wanting the aisle seat.
He is kic king the shit out of the seat in front of him.
ah, bgblue is on the plane with you
have mercy tem, kids suck on airplanes no matter how good they are
piece
Jug's niece is an angel on the plane
She has the Toys R Us store at her disposal
wall
Payton stays with saints
Until Goodell voids the deal
Utah Qb completed more to me than he did his own teammates.
38 unanswered
champion tem
My niece scored 40 unanswered in our league
now we have to go through all the jokester shit like job offers and 5 weeks of recruiting
Got the flu...it sucks...woe
I recruited enough. I only have 1 scholarship left.
I'll advance when I get home
Blue is up for coaching carousel
tem is up for coaching carousel
Coaching carousel is dumb
Yes
can we just skip the carousel...nobody is going to change jobs
Ok
Players leaving
Just got my hair cut by a Kate upton look alike, not the body but looked just like her
Fucking wava
Gene Smith will be a huge bust.
I had like 28 pts on wava. Fuck them
Now I wish I would have taken the auburn job
Picking wava was dumb on your part.
meiz has like 28 guys leaving
done with the convincing to stay.
lets keep that train a rollin
Cuse whipped then the last two times they played.
I got offered the auburn OC yob
Did tem convince players yet?
Tem had nobody to convince
I should have taken the ms state job. Fucking wava.
somehow I had the first shot at that job
Alphabetical order
maybe boise state should move into the SEC
Transfer requests
Doesn't look like anyone has any
Week 1 recruiting
I hAve 1 scholarship left.
UFC pick looking good as usual
I'm ready to advance to week 2 when blue is done
My bowl picks sucked today
i'm ready to advance to week2
Went golfing this morning. It was fucking cold
Sorry EP
Broncos better not fuck this up
We're on week 2 now
I'm recruiting a dude from my hike school, just because
I'm done with week 2 recruiting
Megaton came up just shy of 2k
Keith was right, I was wrong
I was?
On to week 3 now
I made a comment before the season that megaton could get 2k yards this year, and you were highly skeptical and offered to bet, but I wisely declined
Broncos too seed in afc
Cmon vikes
Top seed*
I have 3 scholarships left
I made a comment before the season that megaton could get 2k yards this year, and you were highly skeptical and offered to bet, but I wisely declined
Oh, nice. You were almost bluestradamus
Good game in Minni
Go Pack Go!
I'm done with week 3
I gotta see that show where the celebrities jump off a high dive
S
Haha fuck cutler
Sucks to finish 9 yards short of the record
Shoulda scored a TD
Congrats, Kod
Funny part about the post game interview with Purple Jesus was that he had no clue he had come so close.
Post a Comment